i dun understand y the f*** my life has to be like that... everything always has to be taken away... i always have to lose out in the end... when hope was at it's very height, u just had to take EVERYTHING away... when i just want to slp my life off, u have to wake me up every now and then reminding me how bitter this F***ED UP life is... u just never intended for me to have a purpose rite? i c no point in having this life, and yet i just can't end it... SO WHAT THE F*** DO U EXPECT ME TO DO?!?!?!?!?!?! with the pathetically concerned family members that i have who dun even realise anything but condemn u the moment they catch u doing something out of the ordinary, forgetting all those moments that was put forth in good intentions... SHUT UP!!!! SHUT UP!!!! dun talk to me anymore!!!!!! I HELL WANT TO HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS WORLD!!!!!! I SIMPLY LOVE MY FUCKED UP LIFE IN EVERY SENSE!!!!!! U WANT ME TO SMILE?!?!?!?!!??!?!?! THEN I SHALL SMILE WITH EVERY DISGUST I HAVE LEFT, WITH EVERY BARE TINGE OF HAPPINESS I HAVE REMAINING!!!!! UNTIL I SOON EXHAUST THEM ALL OUT UNTIL I BECOME WHAT I AM NOW - A FUCKED-UP IDIOT!!!!!! FUCK OFF!!!!