rewatched FF7 advent children ytd... really reflective of my situation now...

i think i just want to be forgiven... forgiven for everything that i've done to all my dearest friends... i'm guilty, guilty as hell, ever since i got to know them.. stressing them for my practicals, stressing them with my emo-ness... causing so much trouble being so last minute and so unhelpful... and most importantly, to me, is not being able to bring that smile onto your faces...

i ignored all of you so that you all could live a much better life... a life of happiness never known... a life without me destroying all of your happiness... n believe me i really meant for the best for u... i'm sure through this time u've found your new happiness gang and true friends... like cloud said, "i dun think i can save the world anymore."

i guess this makes my jc life... it sucks like hell... it's been really the worse phase of my life, yet the best with people whom i call true friends... i may seem like i'm treating u all like dirt, but if u all ever read this... i really do care... i really do... if not i would have stuck to u like glue and wreak havoc in your life...

i'm empty now... nothing on to cling to... nothing to believe in... nobody to look to... no day to look forward to... i'm just an empty vessel waiting to be degenerated one day...